さつき盆栽花季展 / Satsuki azalea bonsai exhibition
I would dieeee!!!
Me one day I’mma caption it “on my white people shit” 💅💅💅
I would pee my pants
ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD
THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS
YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN
SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE.
NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING
NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED
IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGES
thanks for the tip karkat
I came across this Said Mhamad wedding dress and immediately thought, “I wonder if my husband will want another wedding ceremony.” LOL OMG isn’t it gorgeous?
Just read chapter 3 and I'm loving it. The granddaddy, seems like he has realized the mistakes he's made and has tried to do justice for them. The dad on the other hand, from what has been told, is good at keeping grudges. (cont.)
"…It’ll be interesting to see how (when he does pass away) the death will affect the father. But it seems like it just won’t be him but as well the community he has help build for the black community in his city. It’ll be interesting to see."
Thanks, dear! Yes, the grandfather definitely has made some mistakes in his past and now he is suffering from them at a time when his life is almost at an end.
Jodye definitely is holding a grudge. As an author, I try to remain neutral in the father-son situation because I expect a grudge to be held when someone has been abused as a child. That’s a trauma that is likely to stick well into adulthood if not handled properly. It’s easier for us to have sympathy for the grandfather because he is old, despite my beliefs on forgiveness and giving people chances. I think that the father-son relationship is much deeper than any of the characters can fathom.
As for granddad’s legacy living on when passes, that is questionable. I don’t think he is as popular as I probably made him seem in the chapter. He was recognized by a guy that is old according to Sydney, so you can assume that the ice-cream truck owner was around during the time granddad was very active in the community. But since time has passed and granddad has gotten too old to really do anything, his legacy depends on education - whether someone in the community will honor him and let it be known to current residents, young and old, about what he’s done in his life.
Great feedback. I love how keen you are to minute details in the story that are so easy to be overlooked. Thanks!
Exactly. The father-son problems are always a bit more dramatic than we expect. Grudges are held and sometimes they don’t disappear in time how the parent may think they do. It will always be easier to fake a smile then actually get rid of the grudge and Jodye seems to be waiting for the day he passes away, which sadly won’t resolve anything for them.
When I read the part about the salute, the first thing that came into mind was The Black Panthers. Was the granddad associated in any way with them? Because it will also explain the amount of respect others have for him.
Oh and not to forget the auntie. I feel so bad that’s the type of treatment she receives from a close-minded community. I will personally like to see how her character continues to play a part in Sydney’s life.
This is so important!
I never know what to ask and end up looking like a fool cause I don’t have a question prepared.
Don’t be me.
One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay.
(Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.)
Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks.
Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris.
Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together.
Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own.
(Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.)
Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you.
Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place.
Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects.
Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers.
Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do.